Create a Considerate Cubicle Culture

I was trolling the internet, looking for interesting takes on cubicle culture, and found this little gem. These are instructions on how to behave in a cubicle environment. If it was even slightly tongue-in-cheek, I would not have found it very funny. But (the source will remain nameless) they were deadly serious, and I quote:

• Speak softly. Use your “library voice” when speaking on the phone or with colleagues so you don’t distract other from their work.
• Keep personal discussions to a minimum. Save in-depth conversations about your weekend plans or the dating scene for after work. If you need to take care of a personal matter immediately, find an empty meeting room or use a cell phone outside the office to attend to the issue.
• Suffer alone. If you’re ill, consider staying home while you recover. By sneezing or coughing at work, you risk infecting others.
• Respect others’ privacy. Don’t eavesdrop on your coworkers’ conversations. Even if someone next to you discusses a topic to which you have insight, only contribute if you’re asked to.
• Avoid meals with distinct odors. If you’re eating lunch or a snack at your desk, avoid food with a strong smell. Some people may find it offensive or, worse, be allergic to it.
• Decorate in moderation. While you should try to make your cubicle as comfortable to you as possible, be aware of what you display or put on your walls. Your firm may not allow certain items. Others may offend your coworkers.

This is, of course, all good advice, but lighten up a little guys. Especially about the decorations. What’s wrong with a few de-motivational posters and soft toys around the place?

Sounds like the perfect work environment to me. Don’t cough too loudly out there.

If you want a more light-hearted look at the issue, check out “The Cubicle Survival Guide” by James F Thompson.